Quadrilateral Cowboy: Hack, Steal, Eat Ramen
Blendo Games’ Quadrilateral Cowboy is a snapshot of the lives of three lifelong friends and professional hackers, Poncho, Lou and Maisy. It follows these three women as they perform a series of heists in an alternate version of the 1980s, with hoverbikes, cybernetic augmentations and space elevators. Quadrilateral Cowboy empowers me with a “top-of-the-line hacking deck armed with a 56.6k modem and a staggering 256k RAM” to pull off these heists. I spent much of my time in the game manipulating the world by typing lines of code. Quadrilateral Cowboy’s programming is a simplified version of actual coding that conveys both the rush of success from affecting the environment by simply typing on a computer terminal as well as the agonizing frustration of banging my head against a brick wall of code.
Quadrilateral Cowboy is split up into a series of heists, each one with multiple components in the form of puzzles. Every heist location and set piece feels unique: one you’re robbing a fancy villa, another level, a futuristic medical clinic, and another still a moving truck. Some of the set pieces are impressive far beyond what I would expect from a game created almost entirely by one person (Brendon Chung), such as one set on three parallel moving cable cars. Each cable car has something different you need to steal and a different means of entry, and all the while they accelerate upwards into the fog. And though the visuals seem simplistic at first, they instead come across as the aesthetic of this world. They are not a hindrance to the game’s experience but a unique means of presenting the genre of cyberpunk, which has been done in so many ways, but none that have looked like this, at least in my experience.
Quadrilateral Cowboy not only engages through its ever-changing heists, but through the way it incorporates some of the best parts of actual coding – the feeling of ingenuity and discovery that comes from reworking the world through simply typing on a computer. Pulling off the heists and solving the puzzles involves using the in-game computer terminal to manipulate security devices or your own gadgets, such as a computer-controlled rifle or a remote trigger to execute computer commands from afar. By typing commands, you can open a door, fire a gun, take over a security camera, and much, much more. Each heist gives a new way to interact with the world and then lets it reappear in future heists to compound with other new mechanics. Realizing how to combine the rifle with the augmentation to fire it remotely to open a timed door gave my synapses a rush as they connected to see the world in new ways through programming. As soon as the different gadgets and security manipulations have their moments, Quadrilateral Cowboy pivots laterally to find entirely new ways to approach heists. The mechanical density on display in Quadrilateral Cowboy is an antithesis to many larger, bloated games that stretch their core systems far too thin. Its determination to never let things become stale is admirable, even if it doesn’t always succeed.
Just as the sense of discovery I had when I first learned to program soon gave way to frustration and tedium as I stared at the same lines of code over and over again, so too Quadrilateral Cowboy had me staring at the same parts of levels over and over again, far past the point they stopped being enjoyable. Quadrilateral Cowboy punishes many slight mistakes by making you repeat the whole level over. The feeling of discovery that came with using new gadgets or mechanics in heists is replaced with frustration, or worse, boredom, as I’m forced to repeat rote actions. Aiming a gun to hit a target perfectly through a small open window felt great the first time. The fifth time I had to aim at that same target because I’d been forced to restart the level was maddening. And I would have to restart for mistakes that seemed as simple as forgetting a semicolon in my code. In the villa level, the second floor is blocked by a wall of lasers, which can be shut off by a button on the first floor. I was curious, so I shut them off and went upstairs. Except that once upstairs, the lasers reactivated and I had no way of getting back downstairs without tripping them. Furthermore, there was nothing upstairs of value to my current objective, but I didn’t know that beforehand. So when I went back downstairs, the alarm triggered and a security turret killed me. I had to restart the whole level. It felt like I had been punished for curiosity with tedium, and that was far from the only time.
-
For Better And Worse, Possessor(s) Offers a Hellish World You Can Get Lost In By Elijah Gonzalez November 11, 2025 | 12:00pm
-
The Brilliant Lumines Arise Is an IQ Test I Enjoy Failing By Garrett Martin November 11, 2025 | 9:00am
-
Detective Games Don't Get Better than The Séance of Blake Manor By Bee Wertheimer November 10, 2025 | 12:00pm
-
Ambrosia Sky Is An Immersive Sim About Fighting Alien Fungus That Mostly Cleans Up Okay By Elijah Gonzalez November 10, 2025 | 9:00am
-
Mortal Kombat: Legacy Kollection Is a Blood-Splattered Time Capsule By Garrett Martin November 4, 2025 | 4:29pm
-
Pokémon Legends: Z-A Uses Its Breakneck Pace to Smooth Over Any Dull Moments By Farouk Kannout October 30, 2025 | 11:30am
-
I Mother Stretches for Fundamental Human Questions and Provides Humdrum Video Game Answers By Grace Benfell October 27, 2025 | 2:30pm
-
So Far, Dispatch Is a Smart Superhero Story That Lives up to Telltale’s Legacy By Elijah Gonzalez October 21, 2025 | 10:00am
-
Ninja Gaiden 4 Sticks to the Bloody Basics By Michael Murphy October 20, 2025 | 7:00pm
-
Absolum Is A Dark Fantasy Beat ‘Em Up With Best-In-Class Fisticuffs By Elijah Gonzalez October 9, 2025 | 9:00am
-
Hades II Is a Rich, Strong, Resonant Echo—But an Echo Nonetheless By Garrett Martin September 24, 2025 | 11:00am
-
Consume Me Can Be a Bit Too Autobiographical By Bee Wertheimer September 24, 2025 | 9:00am
-
Blippo+ Makes Art Out of Channel Surfing By Garrett Martin September 23, 2025 | 12:00pm
-
Silent Hill f Is an Unnerving and Symbolically Dense Return To Form By Elijah Gonzalez September 22, 2025 | 3:01am
-
You’ll Want To Tune In For Wander Stars, An RPG That Feels Like An ‘80s Anime By Wallace Truesdale September 19, 2025 | 12:00pm
-
Horror Game Eclipsium Can't Quite Escape the Shadow of More Consistent Peers By Elijah Gonzalez September 19, 2025 | 9:00am
-
Pokémon Concierge Is Back With Another Extremely Cuddly Vacation By Elijah Gonzalez September 4, 2025 | 9:30am
-
Cronos: The New Dawn’s Survival Horror Thrills Mostly Redeem Its Narrative Missteps By Elijah Gonzalez September 3, 2025 | 10:00am
-
Metal Eden Should Let Go and Embrace the Flow By Bee Wertheimer September 2, 2025 | 11:00am
-
Gears of War: Reloaded Is an Upscaled Snapshot of a Distant, Darker Time By Maddy Myers August 26, 2025 | 11:00am
-
Metal Gear Solid Delta: Snake Eater Is A Great Way to Play One of the Best Games Ever Made By Elijah Gonzalez August 22, 2025 | 3:01am
-
Shredding Serenity in Sword of the Sea By Garrett Martin August 18, 2025 | 11:00am
-
Discounty Makes Expanding A Supermarket Fun, Hectic, And Bittersweet By Wallace Truesdale August 15, 2025 | 9:54am
-
Off Is A Fever Dream of an RPG That Hasn’t Lost Its Swing By Elijah Gonzalez August 14, 2025 | 3:30pm
-
Abyssus Is a Roguelike FPS That Largely Overcomes Rocky Waters By Elijah Gonzalez August 12, 2025 | 11:00am
-
MakeRoom Is a Sweet Treat of an Interior Design Game By Bee Wertheimer August 6, 2025 | 11:55am
-
Gradius Origins Is an Excellent Introduction to a Legendary Shoot 'Em Up Series By Garrett Martin August 5, 2025 | 3:45pm
-
Dead Take Turns the Horror of the Hollywood Machine into a Psychological Escape Room By Toussaint Egan July 31, 2025 | 3:00am
-
Ninja Gaiden: Ragebound Hones The Series’ 2D Platforming To A Fine Point By Elijah Gonzalez July 30, 2025 | 11:00am
-
Fretless: The Wrath of Riffson Is a Sweet Riff on the Rhythm RPG By Bee Wertheimer July 25, 2025 | 9:40am
-
s.p.l.i.t Finds Fear In The Command-Line By Elijah Gonzalez July 24, 2025 | 10:00am
-
Killing Floor 3 Is a Shooter By the Numbers By Diego Nicolás Argüello July 24, 2025 | 9:00am
-
Here in the Wheel World, Cycling Is a Sweet Dream that Always Comes True By Garrett Martin July 23, 2025 | 12:00pm
-
Wuchang: Fallen Feathers Is a Beautiful Soulslike By Veerender Jubbal July 22, 2025 | 10:00pm
-
Monument Valley 3 Maintains The Series’ Charm, But Could Use A New Perspective By Elijah Gonzalez July 21, 2025 | 7:01pm
-
Shadow Labyrinth: The First Pac-Troid Game Gets Lost in the IP Woods By Garrett Martin July 17, 2025 | 10:00am
-
The Drifter Is a Gripping Mystery with Grating Characters By Maddy Myers July 17, 2025 | 10:00am
-
Whoa Nellie, EA Sports College Football 26 Avoids a Sophomore Slump By Kevin Fox Jr. July 14, 2025 | 3:37pm
-
Everdeep Aurora Rewards Those Willing To Dig Deeper By Elijah Gonzalez July 9, 2025 | 11:00am
-
Death Stranding 2: On the Beach Is Heartfelt, Gonzo, And Builds On Its Predecessor In Nearly Every Way By Elijah Gonzalez June 23, 2025 | 8:00am