The 10 Best Contracts in Hitman History
Agent 47’s shiny dome first graced our screens way back in the halcyon days of the year 2000. With a new millennium ahead of us, Hitman: Codename 47 introduced us to new opportunities for digital murder. We were encouraged to enjoy the hunt. To be invisible. Where failure often meant not our death, or the escape of the our target. No, to us would-be assassin’s failure came when we had to resort to a simple bullet to the head. It gets the job done, but there’s no grace to it. Too messy. Stalking men through urban jungles and setting the trap for that one euphoric moment when it all comes together is what led us here. It’s sixteen years later and we’re still making our way down the hit list.
With this list I’ve attempted to represent the full spectrum of what makes Hitman tick across the entire series. Undoubtedly your favorite mission is absent, but that itself is a solid statement on the quality level of a long running series that rarely drops. Now follow me into a world of assassination!
10. Attack Of The Saints (Hitman: Absolution)
Hitman: Absolution was not a game of highs. The linear, more narrative focused affair felt like a misstep for a lot of fans. It moved away from the distinctive puzzlebox-like level structure of past titles. That is not to say it was without merit. The story had a grindhouse feel that glimpses of promise in amongst the cracks.
Of all the levels in the game I remember Attack of the Saints the most. Not because of the titular saints. Not for any great story beat. This level is great because of the cornfield. In a game that so often funneled the player towards a specific goal, to be allowed to run amok in the middle of the night garroting countless hapless guards amidst the dense corn felt like some kind of release. It’s like the scene from The Lost World: Jurassic Park with the raptors in the tall grass. Just replace the pack of raptors with one bald man and a length of piano wire.
9. Traditions Of The Trade (Hitman: Codename 47)
An oldie but a goodie. We have arrived in Budapest to put a stop to terrorist Franz Fuchs’ scheme to blow up all the leaders of the world’s great nations. So no pressure then. For such a diabolical plan, being locked in a sauna and sweating to death is a pretty ignominious way to go.
47 can end up being very chatty with the target, depending on disguise and location. He’s quipping his way to success. There’s also a lovely nod to Terminator 2 where you can carry a shotgun around inside a flower box. More importantly, this is the one level out of the whole series that has the most potential for being successfully adapted into a Wes Anderson style caper, which counts for a lot.
8. Beldingford Manor (Hitman: Contracts)
This mission positively drips with atmosphere. Agent 47 emerges from the rain-swept darkness of rural England to hunt the most dangerous game of all: the British aristocracy. Taking place in a creaky and absolutely spooky manor house, plus the accompanying grounds, we’re tasked with ending the lives of father and son Beldingford while rescuing their hostage, who will no doubt be the target of the upcoming hunt.
More than anything else, Beldingford Manor is a wonderful showpiece of the power with which a well-designed level can enthrall a player. The targets and the means of their demise aren’t particularly difficult to pull off, but the house itself is the main character here, with its secret passages, foreboding atmosphere, and lecherous old toffs. The thrill of the hunt makes way for hushed appreciation for the darkness that dwells within the blackened hearts of men.
7. A New Life (Hitman: Blood Money)
There is something hilarious about a hardened gangster going stir crazy in an American suburban hellscape, complete with tidy lawns, annoying neighbors and bored housewives. The series has always dripped with black humor, and coupled with this, what makes A New Life stand out is the sheer variety on show. It forms the quintessential Hitman experience.
It’s not an expansive level, or even that complicated, but there’s a lot of scope to try things out and goof around. Do you distract the surveillance officers with donuts, take on the guise of an alcoholic clown, or presume the role of a pole boy willing to be seduced? Maybe you just want to rig the BBQ to blow and watch the bodies burn. Avoiding detection in such a confined space as a suburban home encourages smart and quick witted play, and taking advantage of opportunities as they arise on the fly.
Don’t worry if proceedings start to get a little heated. Luckily there’s a garbage truck down the street with an insatiable appetite for human bones, should you need to dispose of those pesky, attention grabbing corpses. Bodies in the pool and blood on the lawn. A sad clown fed to a trash compactor. It’s Hitman at its best.
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