Time May Change Me: David Bowie and Omikron: The Nomad Soul

This piece first ran in August 2014.
Every time I thought I’d got it made / It seemed the taste / was not so sweet—David Bowie, “Changes,” Hunky Dory, 1971
We’ll all be right, we’ll all be right / We’ll all be right in the now—David Bowie, “We All Go Through,” Omikron: The Nomad Soul Soundtrack, 1999
A redheaded guy with a too-spherical face and extremely widely-set eyes jumps through a pixelated hurricane of a portal and immediately starts in with a fast-paced, confusing speech about transferring my soul into his body in order to enter his dimension and perform some urgent mission. After what seems like an intentionally vague cut-scene featuring both a monster and a bipedal robot, I am knocked several feet by one of countless identical hovercars, losing about eighty percent of my health.
So began my attempt to revisit Omikron, a half-written symphony of a virtual city and a nearly impressive failure of a videogame.
One of Omikron’s most touted features was the inclusion of three styles of play: third-person adventuring, head-to-head fighting and first-person shooting. Each is broken in its own elegant, low-level way. Omikron’s most significant in-game text, including municipal signs, is set in a typeface that is part stereotypical Egyptian script, part Mr. Saturn from Earthbound, and nearly unreadable. The city’s curiously plentiful bikini-clad asses are rendered angular and unconvincing, even by the standards of the day. Omikron’s status as a police state is the crux of the game’s first act, but the security at the city’s police headquarters can be entirely circumvented using a drugged cup of coffee and a pornographic magazine.
All of the above points were lost on me in 2002, during my first tour of Omikron. I was stuck whiling away summer vacation at my parents’ house, and my copy of Omikron was less a collection of bugs and half-baked ideas and more a decent-sized well of things to do that weren’t eating snacks, trying (with moderate success) to fool myself into liking the era’s lunk-headed brand of straight edge hardcore, or talking to internet friends. In fact, I enjoyed the game so much that I bestowed upon it the greatest honor available to me at the time: A couple of weeks later I rented it a second time in order to finish it. Almost exactly 12 years later, it appeared on a GOG sale and effortlessly coaxed a nostalgia-coated tenner out of my imaginary digital wallet.