Why Are Trans People So Good at Videogames?
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Why are trans people so good at videogames? For being a tiny percentage of the population, we’ve sure made a name for ourselves—from trans players like Ricki Ortiz and UMISHO becoming some of the world’s best fighting game players to trans speedrunners making strides in nearly every leaderboard, trans people are everywhere in competitive games. Hell, when I first started speedrunning, even the niche game I got into had multiple trans runners topping the various leaderboards.
But why? It seems too disproportionate to be a coincidence, but there’s nothing inherent about being trans that leads to supreme gaming skill. After reflecting on my own experiences and talking with other trans people in competitive spaces, I’m going to attempt to answer that question.
It’s 2016. I’m in middle school. I just moved and I can’t make friends with the other boys at school because there’s something off about me and boy do they let me know it. One day I learn about something called Pokémon Showdown with people who play one of my favorite games competitively, and I decide that I need to learn everything I can to become one of them. For the next few months, I may not have friends, but I have Pokémon.
It’s 2022. I just finished my first year of college and it’s not going how I’d hoped. All my friends from high school have more college friends than me and I don’t know what to do about it and I’m increasingly sure that there’s something wrong with me. In the middle of this, I start ranking high in the level leaderboards in Demon Turf and man it feels good. For the next year or so, I may not be happy with myself, but I’m happy with my speedruns.
It’s 2024. I finally figured out why it felt like something was off, like something was wrong with me. Unidentified gender dysphoria is a tricky beast. It hides in plain sight, in places that are obvious in hindsight but confounding in the moment. It’s a never-ending voiceless cry that, despite its near-silence, still drowns out the world around you. How do you find self-worth, self-purpose, in this state?
Well, you get really fucking good at videogames.